Whenever we get full moons across the Leo/Aquarius sign axis, we’re usually being asked to look at the subjects of identity and authenticity, popularity or positive projections of self-image versus rebelliousness and individuation away from the herd. In the USA our national psyche was “born” under an Aquarius Moon, and so the tension of the Leo/Aquarius dynamic feels built into most of our cultural values. Our national history is framed as the history of a group of brave outcasts and rebels, people who rejected the monarchy (Leo) and established a democracy (Aquarius). We worship at the altars of progress, invention, and individuation..the kind of forward thinking that proudly shatters the status-quo, that doesn’t care what others think, and whose alienated status at the beginning is the necessary condition for its genius and eventual fame at the end. But there’s the Leo…that “eventual” fame. The rebel eventually becomes the new king, possibly even the new tyrant or dictator. The Aquarian kid who doesn’t make the basketball team in high school eventually becomes Michael Jordan.
The guiding fiction or fantasy, the evolutionary “need,” of Aquarius is about the insight or genius we receive when we go through a period of time from the outside looking in. Where we must learn to be less concerned with what others think of us, and we become marginalized for what we believe or the way we dress or the kind of sex we like to have. When we learn to entertain ideas that are dark or heavy, complex and not easy topics for the dinner table…all of these things take us to the cold outskirts of the soul…those frosty places where we might feel alone but we can also see the cosmic design of the stars and planets, the divine geometry, stretching out forever right above our heads. This is the place of our genie, our daemon, or the stars themselves. This is the place where we see how much bigger things are than whether or not we’re liked or loved by others. What we see here catalyzes within us a revolution. We are provoked, and it’s disturbing. An inner riot is taking place, with maybe a few looters or vandalizers running amok. We speak up. Raise our fist, “I don’t care what you think about me anymore.” In its own way it’s kind of sexy. Peculiar. A trend setter. Inspiring authenticity in others. But also perpetually tortured, outcast, and continually individuating away from that stable place called “admiration” or “popularity.”
Leo’s guiding fiction, on the other hand, is completely different. For Leo the primary concern has to do with being well liked, loved, celebrated, seen, and even worshiped. While Aquarius is on the edges, exploring the vast nether worlds, Leo is the bright star burning at the center. The glowing heart fire that radiates and pulls all things into an orbit around itself. Leo’s purpose is less about catalyzing provocative ideas, genius, and revolution and more about stabilizing an image of self whose authority, beauty, and power is inspiring of the devotion and loyalty of others. Leo’s vision is toward the enduring goodness and unity of a kingdom. For Leo there is no idea that cannot be communicated or expressed in a way that is celebrated and loved by everyone. Leo has an awareness of the audience that will generally trump the needs of a subversive thought. Leo is here to figure out how to be one’s authentic self while still retaining that bright self-center: “who I am AND how its received are equally important.”
Often enough our initial attraction to eastern spirituality and metaphysics comes from the Aquarian call to outsider exploration. We find a much vaster sense of who we are and why we are here when we explore foreign ideas or altered states of consciousness. But then we might find ourselves wanting to be new age rock stars. Now that we’ve “found our tribe,” we may want to be liked and loved for who we are within the progressive spiritual scene. And really there’s nothing wrong with this. Leo and Aquarius are always doing this dance. Maybe the key is to recognize that we simply can’t have one without the other! And along with this comes a crucial insight: if we’re seeking a sense of centrality or celebrity within a tribe of outcasts it’s possible that our centrality won’t last very long. In other words, it might be more important for us to go back into the original world we came from, equipped with the outsider knowledge we’ve gained, than to try to build some eternal kingdom on the outskirts of rebel town. It might be more important to be popular or well liked for who we are in a world where our outsider insights are truly original than to compete for attention in club Aquarius.
Of course, this will always mean that those in club Aquarius will look at us and scream, “sell out, sell out!” But we have to consider that these accusations are reflective of either someone’s jealousy or their need to remain, for the time being, in a marginalized place of learning and individuating. We can’t always take it so personally when people accuse of wanting to be liked. Of course we want to be liked, why wouldn’t we?
For example, all those people who were born with the North Node in Leo are learning how to take their outsider insights (perhaps from previous lives?) and express them in a way that is pleasing to others. Rather than being “in your face rebels,” those with Leo north nodes are learning how to be radiant sources of inspiration, warmth, and encouragement to others. They are learning how to be more aware of the audience, more aware of what they project and how it reflects. All of this is generally happening because the soul has an accumulation of insights and wisdom that are ready to be expressed in a very powerful, lovable (even popular) way. And as hard as it might be for Aquarians to imagine, massive revolutions or changes need the enlightening charms and solar powers of celebrities. This is why no matter how beautiful or progressive the ideas, most people will be less ready to accept anything when its coming from a place of ostracization, anger, or resentment. Every outsider movement needs fountainheads and charismatic personalities who are loved. Every civil rights movement needs a “King.”
On the other hand, those with Aquarian north nodes are working toward the exact opposite goal, where the need for approval or too much time in the limelight has created a stagnation in the soul. The soul will thus need provocation, rebellion, frustration, and the experience of being an outsider. The soul will need to care less if people like the changes or if people are “warmed” by its presence, and the soul won’t be as compelled by those charming kings and queens of the masses. In fact, they might be here to question or kill a few of them (metaphorically speaking).
For today’s full moon the most important thing to remember is that we are each called to the polarities of this dynamic in different ways and at different times. Worrying too much about consistency or some abstract notion of the perfect balance between them is like paying too much attention to the way you walk, rather than just walking. It’s okay to worry about not being liked. Sometimes it’s actually good for you. It’s okay to worry that you’re not popular enough. Sometimes its far more authentic than, “not caring what others think.” At the same time, the opposite is also true. So what can we do but remain aware of these dynamics and enjoy the ride?! What more can we do than to remember these dynamics in our relationships with others? And what more can we do than to keep a good sense of humor and remember that every rebel needs his king and every queen needs her rebel.
Prayer: Rebel King Over Royal City
and red carpets without blood
Calls the winter redbird
to mock the dynasty
of new thoughts